I provide counselling for individuals seeking guidance either already in a stepfamily relationship, or considering entering into a relationship where step parenting and stepchildren are involved. Stepfamilies dynamics are unlike the rules, roles and responsibilities we learnt in our family of origin, where the couple come together and the children follow.
As individuals in a stepfamily we often find it daunting to feel anything bad about someone else’s’ child, let alone discuss it. This causes us to drift apart as a couple and we withdraw, avoid, become anxious and feel extremely on the outside.
We ask ourselves ‘why won’t they like me, why don’t I like them?’ To express this to your new or existing partner is extremely difficult. How to let your partner know your inner most feelings is what we learn to do in counselling. Learning to listen to each other without judgement, criticism or anger and work together to address these difficult feelings.
Stepfamilies go through various stages or cycles, the early, middle and later. Moving through these stages can often be fraught with anxiety and feelings of loneliness. It can be so confusing wondering why it isn’t working. This is addressed in individual counselling.
Stepfamilies run differently to a biological family. The need to speak openly and honestly can sometimes be extremely difficult when discussing another person’s child. To know that these feelings are pretty normal can be the start to feeling better about your stepfamily life.
Knowing what to expect as you move through the stages of stepfamily life and how to manage this takes patience, tolerance and skill. What to expect, what is normal and how to address the inevitable challenges that becoming a stepfamily can throws at us.
I will guide you to understand the inevitable pitfalls and the struggle that couples encounter; identify where you are now and understand the predictable journey ahead.
